chapter seventeen – through thick and thin part iii

Monday, May 16, 1988 – Huntington Beach

Allison awoke just before sunrise. Looking at her alarm clock confirmed it was just after 6AM.  From her position in bed, she could see the warm, rosy glow of the sun reflecting off the water and bouncing onto the row of apartments. The low lying fog outside her window cloaked the grounds of the apartment complex. By noon it would be burnt away by the warm southern California sun, but right now it was hazy, gloomy and mysterious. She loved waking up on days like this. It seemed somehow cozy and made her want to stay in bed all day.

She stretched her body out sleepily in the bed smiling at the immediate contact from the hard body behind her. She loved the feel of him. It had been this way every single day since the day he took her to the Ranch, the day he had asked her to move in with him. She sighed as she snuggled back closer to his warm frame. He made a small murmur before his arms surrounded her tightly. She almost wanted to giggle hysterically she was so unbelievable happy right now.  She still couldn’t believe everything that had happened in the last week. Actually she believed it. The man in her bed was living proof it was 100% real. But it really did feel like a fairytale to her, an enchanted story she would lose herself in as a child. It was too good to be true except it was.

Val's reaction summed it up perfectly... "How does that happen... I mean really Allison, how does it happen?? Michael Jackson? Michael Jackson asks you to move in with him?? And not just some old mansion in the hills but on a secluded ranch in wine country! God damn girl, I just don't know what you did in your former life... but what I do know is you had better damn well said HELL YA MICHAEL and said it with capital H!

She wasn't sure either what good deeds or miracles she had performed in a previous life to deserve him, but she was not about to waste another single second being apart from him or running away from him. Of course she said yes!

When he had shown up at her apartment a week ago she was so shocked and surprised to see him, she really hadn’t given it any thought how long he was staying and when he was going to leave. She was just so happy to have him there. She didn't know what to expect and had no idea that he would be staying here at her place for more than a week. If she had thought about it before hand, she would have said there was no way in hell he could get in and out of Huntington Beach undetected let alone stay there! But sure enough he had and every morning she would wake up early and he was there, arms wrapped around her in some way, shape or form. Most mornings she was turned in towards him, head tucked protectively under his chin, his arms draped around her. Or she was on her side, like she was this morning, Michael in behind her, chest to back, pelvis to backside and thigh to thigh. They fit together perfectly and there was no place she would rather be. She loved waking up beside him and she was definitely getting spoiled by his daily presence.

When he asked her if she wanted to move in with him it almost felt like he breathed a sigh of relief when she threw her arms around his neck affirming she would love to live with him. She could feel his smile against her cheek and he hugged her tight telling her it would be magical.
"It already is Michael, it already is," her voice barely above a whisper and full of emotion. She didn't want to let this moment go without telling him how she felt.
"I love you Michael."
His smile radiated through her as he cupped her face, "Girl, I love you more." He pressed his lips to hers, "so much more." She would soon find out that would become his favourite thing to say to her.
He started to pull her towards the front doors, "come on let's go tell Bill."

As they came past the set of double glassed doors and down the steps to the path to Bill it dawned on her that very shortly they were going to be a real open couple to the whole world. There would be no more hiding it they were living together. It would be impossible. But she wasn't scared. This felt right.

They would end up spending the rest of the day at the ranch. First they went out and got Bill who was strolling by the pond with Samson. After giving him the news they went back to the house to the backyard terrace and outdoor patio kitchen. It was designed similar to house with large dark wood beams, multicoloured stone and brick with terracotta styled furnishing. A lunch, that looked to have been prepared in anticipation of their arrival, was already set out for their meal. Even her favourite brand of tea was not to be left out. Michael had taken nothing to chance today, he wanted it to be perfect and it was.

After their lunch they left Bill and Sam to relax in the shade from the warm sun and they strolled the expansive grounds around the main house. They walked hand in hand as Michael elaborated on his plans and ideas for the ranch. He told her he was going to rename it Neverland Ranch after Neverland Island in Peter Pan. He said he was going to have  a zoo, bigger than he had in Encino, with lots of animals. Then they walked up over a bridge and he pointed out where he wanted to have a theatre, a dance studio and a big amusement park with all kinds of rides. There would also be a train and train stations that could take you around the grounds. He told her it was more than 2600 acres! It sounded fantastic and she couldn't wait to share it with him.

They returned to the house just as the sun started to set behind the mountains. Michael told her he wanted to speak with the staff before leaving and she hadn't even noticed they were there the entire time. With him busy inside the house she walked to the truck with Bill, whom had been quiet for most of the day.  Bill never did say very much, but he didn't have to. His demeanor usually spoke for him. But today Allison couldn't get a read on him at all and it made her wonder what he was thinking about.

She turned to him as they waited for Michael to join them, "thank you Bill for driving us out here today. It is so beautiful."
As per usual he gave her a warm smile and nodded, "my pleasure."
She thought he was finished but he caught her by complete surprise as he continued, "you know Allison, you make him happier than I have ever seen him."
"Thanks Bill. I'm glad you see it that away," she smiled feeling slightly relived. When it came to Michael she always felt she needed the approval of those close to him. You couldn't get any closer than Billy Bray. It made her feel so good inside that he approved of them together. "He really makes me happy too."
He nodded, "I've worked for the Jacksons' since Michael was a little boy and now for the last few years, exclusively for Michael. I love him like a son, you're good for him."
She swallowed audibly, "Bill, you're gonna make me cry." She sniffed and dabbed at her eyes, "I think we're good for each other."
He gave her another genuine smile as Michael walked down the path towards them, "you certainly are Allison, you certainly are."

The drive back was long and uneventful. When they arrived back at her apartment it was just after 8PM. It was only then that she found out that Michael had already planned to stay with her for a few days at her place. He said he couldn't think of a better place to rest and relax before they headed to Europe to continue the tour. He looked at her pointedly when he said "they" making sure she understood what he meant. He also added that he wanted to spend time alone with her in her surroundings without anyone around.
She laughed jokingly, "remember, I warned you ages ago, my home life is pretty boring."
"I remember," he smiled. He raised his eyebrow, "boring sounds perfect to me," he joked back.
Bill brought in a small brown suitcase with his belongings and dropped it inside the door before speaking with Michael for a few minutes in private. She could only imagine that Bill was worried about leaving his main charge unattended here with her and he wanted Michael to be safe.

It was almost uncanny how fast they fell into a relaxed rhythm with each other.  Besides the two weekends they had spent together at his condo in Westwood, this was the first time they were together just with the intentions of only being alone together. There was nobody but them. There was no schedule to follow, no photos to take or city tours to embark, no rehearsals to run through and sound checks to attend to, no interviews to give or events to appear. They were both free and clear of any obligations to anything but to being with each other.

Their day would usually start the same way every day. Actually she couldn't speak for Michael, but her day usually started the same way every day. Samson saw to that. Unlike the humans of the household, Samson had a very strict schedule to adhere to. Dogs being the wonderful animals that they were, were creatures of habits, rules and rituals and Samson was no different. So right around daybreak Samson would have his cold nose on her ready for his morning walk.  The yellow Labrador Retriever was use to his morning walks and wasn't about to let Allison miss one. Samson didn't care that they had guest and he didn't seem to care that Michael Jackson was sleeping soundly beside her, he didn't care one bit! So she would get up and leave a warm Michael in bed and get the other man in her life out. Of course, she didn’t mind, she loved her man-dog to pieces and had always enjoyed the walks and playtime with him. But it was a different story when she had another fine super yummy man keeping her warm in her bed. But she knew that Sam couldn’t wait and once up and out the door she was glad she was getting their walk in.

Besides, Michael would be there when she got back. It was early and she would be gone for no more than an hour and she could always rejoin him. At least that's what she thought. As it turned out, more often than not, she would return to find Michael not in bed but in the kitchen creating what he would call breakfast and what she would call a disaster. Her kitchen literally became a minefield of discarded pots and pan and scatted bowls, plates and cutlery. She didn't even know she owned that many dishes.
"What are you doing," she asked the first time morning she found him in the kitchen.
“What’s it look like I'm doing? I'm making us breakfast.”
At first she thought he was doing it out of sympathy for her. Feeling badly about her miscarriage and not being there for her. They had talked a bit more and he wanted to know what happened that day. She had told him about the procedure and Val being there for her. He apologized endlessly and she could tell her felt terrible not being there for her even when they both knew it would have been impossible.
“Michael, you don’t have to do all this, I am quite capable of making us breakfast."
But he insisted saying he wanted to practice before they moved in together so he could make it for her anytime or all the time. He was covered in a soft dusting of flour smiling, "girl, I can't believe you said yes."

After that how could she possibly say no to anything he made? He could have made her anything no matter what it tasted like she would have eaten it with a smile on her face. And actually it wasn't bad at all and it didn't take him long to improve.  With a few little hints on how to work the toaster and how not to leave the stove on with gobs of butter in the frying pan he got better especially at not setting off her kitchen fire detector. He was still making a complete mess of the kitchen. But who was she to complain?? Michael was making her something and looked adorable doing it. The downside, if there really was one, was her tea. She hadn't had a decent cup in a week! Michael had improved with his culinary skills, but the tea making was proving to be quite the daunting task for him. It was either too strong, too weak, too much sugar, not enough milk or just not hot enough. She tried to show him but he would have none of it.
"I'm gonna get it you'll see."

Then after their breakfast and kitchen clean up they would relax and watch movies or sit together and read. Or they would talk about her new favourite subject, the Ranch. He had so many great ideas of what he wanted and how he wanted it. He explained how there would be a movie room with thousands of movies and there would be a concession stand filled with candy and everything would be free. He said the dance studio would have floor to ceiling and mirrors with a full audio system so he could practice his routines.  One afternoon he sketched out a rough map of the entire amusement park area and then wrote out the names and the placement of the rides he wanted to have. It was incredible to witness his thought process in action. He was an endless well of knowledge and ideas and he could explain them all to her so visually and vividly she could see them in her own mind. It was easy to see how his artistry was a natural extension of him as normal as breathing. She couldn’t explain it, it wasn't tangible but she could feel it. One night they were sitting by the fire and he was humming a tune. It sounded like a fully finished song she thought maybe she had heard on the radio but could quite identify the exact song. But when she asked him, he said he was just humming what was in his mind and that music was always there. Like an endless symphony of chords and melodies. Nothing specific just music he said. He said he could hear songs that he would write in years to come.

Another afternoon he wanted a lesson in developing slides and black and white film. She tried to talk him out of it, saying it would be really boring to teach him anything. But honestly she was nervous talking about her skills when they seemed so lackluster compared to his. What could she possible say about creativity that he didn't already know or feel? However Michael insisted knowing her love of photography, she just wasn't use to talking about it. And he was right. Once they got into the darkroom and she was explaining some of the techniques she used to get depth in her photos, she forgot all about talking to Michael Jackson the creative superstar. She was just showing Michael how she created her work.

The time spent together was unlike any other time spent before. By being together in a very quiet way in her very ordinary world it was like getting to know each other on another much deeper level. It wouldn’t have seemed possible; she could feel herself falling for him more. For the most part it was just the two of them and of course Samson, who had taken a quite a liking to Michael and the feeling was mutual. But they really couldn't go anywhere. Although Michael wanted to come with her on evening walks with Sam, she was too afraid he would be recognized and then it would be over.

She asked if he wanted to have Valerie over for dinner one night, which he agreed to happily only if he could put on his disguise.
"Michael, she is so not going to be fooled by that get up."
He chuckled, "you wanna bet?"
She rolled her eyes, "I am so not betting you, but you go right ahead."
So sure enough he did, acting like a total dork the whole afternoon waiting for Val to arrive.

Allison invited Val over on the premise of pizza, wine and a movie. And when she arrived she was surprised to see the "pizza delivery guy" acting rather strangely in Allison's dining room. He set the pizza down on the table then announced he was staying for dinner in a slurred speech.
Val gave Allison an amused looked and then turned her glare towards Michael, who was acting like he was going to sit down.
Val crossed her arms and checked her hip to the side, “uh excuse me honey, what did you just say?”
Allison stood between the kitchen and living room watching, shaking her head. If Val fell for Michael’s trick she would never hear the end if from both of them. But as well, by the looks of it, Michael was about to get the full wrath of Miss. Whitworth. This should be interesting
Michael smiled his crooked smile enjoying his little game, “tits spind a tong tay.” His words did not make any sense or come out right.
“Look Elmer Fudd, what you best do is get your skinny little butt out of that kitchen and back in the clunker you drove here in.”

Here we go…
Allison burst out laughing. Textbook Val.
Michael licked his lips, “Butt time hungey.”

Oh no! What did he just say? It sounded like…

Val’s eyes flashed as she started to walk towards him, wit sharp and claws out, “look you little weenie of a man, I am not going to ask you again.”She reached to grab Michael’s arm. Who by now had started to laugh his silly laugh.
Crap!! Allison moved in between them intercept her, “Val... wait, wait..  No, stop. STOP! It’s Michael, its Michael."
Allison turned towards him, “take off that silly disguise you butthead.” She turned back to Val, her eyes shiny with amusement but a little bit of worry. She hoped she wasn't too mad, “I'm sorry, he wanted to put on the disguise to see if he could fool you.” Her eyes begged her for understanding.
Val looked over Allison shoulder towards Michael as he took off his outfit. He was still giggling and snickering, “I knew I could fool you, she said you wouldn't fall for it, hehehe.”
Val looked at Ally then nodded towards him, "yes, you got me again Mr. Joker, but you're lucky I didn't throw you out on your butt, funny man. That may still happen if you are not careful."
Still laughing Michael walked over to greet her, "it's nice to see you again." He wrapped his arms around her giving her a warm hug as he kissed her cheek lightly.
Val hugged him back laughing too. She could take a joke, but Allison knew she was keeping score. At some point she would get him back.

With Michael’s successful prank out of the way the agreed to eat. Everyone was starving. They enjoyed their pizza and wine and settled in to watch the newly released movie, Beverly Hills Cop, on video. It was quite funny with Eddie Murphy, who Michael had said he had met. After the movie Michael told Val about the remainder of the tour and Val shared her tales of going back home to visit her parents in Boston, which was always good for a good laugh.

Later, when Val was leaving Michael insisted on walking her to the door while Allison cleared away the pizza boxes and glasses. Allison wouldn't learn until later, but Val told her Michael had wanted to talk to her and thank her for being there for her during the miscarriage when he couldn't be.
As they reached the door, Michael touched her gently on the shoulder, "I wanna thank you Val.'
"Thank me for what? Being such an easy target?" She chuckled, "I'll get you back for sure."
Michael smiled, "oh really?”
"Yeah really."
"Okay." His face softened and he met her eyes sincerely, "actually, I want thank you for being there for her, for Ally... for when you know I couldn’t be."
Valerie looked him over seriously. This man really was un-freaking-believable. There was no way in hell he could have known to be there for Allison.  Yet he seemed disturbed that he hadn’t been.
She nodded, “well you just make sure you’re there for her from now on.”
He cleared his throat, "I hope to be."
Valerie had no doubt he would be.


Allison curled her arm under her head, adjusting her pillow watching as the sun started to peak up over the clearing fog. She figured she would try to stay as quiet as possible until Samson came and poked her. She was surprised he hadn’t come and gotten her already, but she wasn’t about to rouse him. She felt Michael shift in response to her movement. She stilled to let him readjust his body around her, fitting himself back in against her again. Maybe she would be here when he woke up and maybe they would make love this morning. She shivered slightly from the warm feeling that ran up her spin. They hadn’t been intimate the entire time he had been here and up until yesterday she had been terrified to be intimate again. She knew he could feel it and he didn’t pressure her in anyway. It wasn’t so much afraid to be with Michael, not at all, she missed his touch and the feel of his skin beneath her hands. But she was afraid of the consequences of being with him. What if she got pregnant again... and if she got pregnant again... what it she had problems again. She just couldn’t do that again, she couldn’t lose another baby. 

They hadn’t really talked about that at all until last night. When he finally told her how he felt about her losing the baby and what he wanted for the future, their future. It had all started a couple of days ago when she told Michael she was thinking she should go and visit her boss Marcus and his family. Grace had given birth at the end of April to a baby boy, Jacob Marcus Daye, and she hadn't been over to see them yet. This would be the first time. Not sure of how she would handle it, she had put it off as long as she could thinking she would go eventually. But now she would be leaving soon with Michael on tour in the next few days and she wanted to see them before the left. So when she told Michael about wanting to go, he shocked her when he asked if he could come too.
"Do you think they would be okay if I came with you?" He asked genuinely sincere about being allowed to join her.
She could barely contain her laughter, "what? Are you kidding me? Would it be okay... uh yeah. Michael if they knew you were here with me and I didn't bring you, the twins would never forgive me and well Grace... Grace would probably kill me!"
His face lit up with a smile, "really, they won't mind?"
"Really, you can trust me on this, you are about to make some ladies very happy."

Of course when she called and let Grace know she had someone special to bring. Grace was ecstatic, but then she got slightly neurotically nervous. She was worried about everything from the state of the house and if it would look nice enough to what to eat and she didn't know what to wear. Only once Allison assured her that it would be fine and to try and just treat it like she was coming over with a friend did Grace finally think about how excited her girls would be.

So yesterday afternoon they snuck out of the apartment to go over the Daye's for dinner. Sunday was family day at their house. It was the one day that everyone was always expected to be home for dinner. Grace insisted on it. It was also how Allison had gotten to know the family so well. When she had first moved to the beach and started her apprenticeship at the studio she didn't know a lot of people in the area and Val was still a year away from moving to Malibu.  Marcus, surely feeling sorry for her, invited her over a couple of times and not long after she was a regular too. She got along great with Grace and their girls, who at the time were 10 and thought of her as a big sister. As the girls got older they were going out more often, sometimes with their friends or together, but Sunday's they were expected to be home and today you couldn't keep them away if you tried.

As she drove up the drive way she saw the curtains move in their den and she shook her head. The screaming going on in there would be ear splitting. She looked at Michael as he adjusted his hat and collar, "you ready?"

"Yeah, I think so." She thought his voice sounded a bit unsure.
She placed her hand on the arm of his varsity jacket "Michael, you okay?"
He looked wonderful as always, wearing his usual black trousers with a black and white checked shirt. He wanted to wear something more formal, but she told him it really wasn't necessary, knowing he would look fantastic no matter what he wore. But she was getting to see that he really was very shy in situations like these. He was probably feeling nervous, even if he wouldn’t admit it. She found it amazing that night after night he could go up and perform on stage in front of thousands of people and never even think twice about it. But one on one he was shy and could be so quiet and withdrawn.
She reached up and moved his scarf to kiss his cheek, “don’t worry, they are like my family, they will love you.”

She wasn’t worried at all about him, of course they would love him and they did! A family night dinner was the perfect way to for everyone to meet. Allison though twins would be the most excited, but it actually turned out to be Grace, who was all flushed when she went to shake his hand and he hugged her instead. She could barely speak.
Allison looked around, “where’s Marcus?”
“Right here,” she turned to see him coming down the stairs with the baby in his arms.  “I wanted to give the girls a chance to meet our guest first.” He smiled towards Michael who was standing quietly behind her. As soon as Marcus reached her with the baby, she could smell his sweet baby smell and she wanted to hold him.
“You wanna hold him Ally while I introduce myself?” She nodded, as he passed her his newborn son.
She barely heard Marcus speak to Michael as she looked down at the little boy in her arms.
“Hi baby, it’s Auntie Ally,” she cooed already totally in love with the bundle in her arms.  She looked up at Marcus, “Marcus he’s perfect.”
“Yeah we kinda like him, so he can stay for as long he wants.”
She rocked him gently in her arms and turned towards Michael who was watching her with the baby. “You want to hold him?”
“No, not yet,” he smiled as he stepped closer to be beside her.  He leaned in closer to the baby, his chin next to her shoulder “I kinda like watching you hold him,” he said quietly.
Michael reached up moving the blue blanket away to touch the baby’s little fists. Immediately little Jacob gabbed his finger and held on tight making Michael eyes light up and laugh with delight.
Later Grace would comment to Marcus how perfect Michael and Ally looked together holding the baby. Although he knew his wife was a notorious matchmaker he had to agree. At that moment together they looked like their own perfect little family.

With the introductions out of the way the afternoon slipped by into evening so quickly that soon it was time to go. It was a typical family night with the Daye’s, with lots of good food, chatter and laughter. Grace even persuaded the girls to stay and play a few board games with the adults.  That no doubt had a little something to do with a certain superstar wanting to play monopoly, which of course he won. Although she was pretty sure he was cheating.  They talked and played the evening away for hours before remembering the girls had school the next day.  The girls protested, but Michael promised he would come back again when the tour returned to the States in the fall and he would make sure they had VIP backstage passes for the shows in LA.

They didn’t stay too much longer after the girls went to bed. By the time they left and got back to the apartment it was passed midnight. Michael let her get ready for bed first and then went to get ready when she was finished. She was turned on her sided facing the window reflecting on the evening. It wasn’t as hard as she thought it was going to be. She was getting there. When he came to bed he didn’t lie down beside her. Instead he pushed himself back to sit up against the head board in silence.
She turned around and sat up too, propping her elbow up on her knee, her chin resting in her palm, “what’s up?”
He didn't say anything at first only stared at his hands.
"Ally, I have to tell you something," he shifted his body to face her. "Tonight, when I saw you holding the baby, it made me wish things were different... that you hadn't lost the baby. It made me wish... he made me want one.” His voice fell to a whisper, “with you.”
Her breath hitched and she swallowed hard. Looking down at her knee a single tear slipped out. The emotion of the day and his words swept over her. Holding that small newborn baby boy didn't remind her of what she lost, but of what she could have.
Michael wiped away the tear, “are you okay?”
She smiled a lopsided grin and met his gaze, “yeah, I think I am.”
“Do you want that Ally? Do want that with me?”
She held his gaze unable to respond. For the first time since losing the baby she could understand why her unplanned pregnancy wasn’t at the right time. It wasn't right, because this is how she wanted to be pregnant and have a baby. With him.  Planning, sharing and talking about it. Not a surprise, not unexpected and not without him every step of the way with her.
She took a deep breath, "you know, I never thought about being a mom before.  It just never entered my mind, but during the time I was pregnant, even when I didn't know I was, I felt so happy. Even though I was sick as a dog almost every day and so tired, inside me, right here," she tapped her chest over her heart, " it felt right."
"So, yeah, yeah" she nodded smiling, "I want that with you."


She opened her eyes coming back from her thoughts of last night, of his words and actions over the last week and how deeply they moved her. How patient and loving he had been not pushing her or asking her for too much. Letting her recover from her loss when he was hurting too. Everything he had done to show her that he wanted to be with her. Even being here in her small little apartment in Huntington Beach. If anyone knew that Michael Jackson was in her apartment, let alone lying here in her bed with her, it would be bedlam. Hell all of Huntingwood Beach and half of LA would converge on her home in a matter of hours.

She gently turned over to face him. He was still fast asleep and she seized the opportunity to take an unabashed look at his features. God you are gorgeous. He was so unbelievable handsome – it was almost impossible to describe in words. Before she met him, she had seen a million pictures, snippets in magazines and on TV but they did not do him justice. She could say that from a professional point of view. He had to be the most beautiful human she had ever seen. His brow, his eye brows, his super long thick eyelashes, his cheekbones, his strong jaw line, his nose, his full lips and his chin... everything. Everything was perfect as far as she was concerned. Even the little tiny scar under his left eye was beautiful. Just a small little mark of imperfection to let you know he really was real.

Moving a bit closer she kissed the tip of his nose. She frowned slightly. She couldn't be sure but she thought it looked different, maybe a little thinner than the last time she had been this close. In Florida he had told her he had broken his nose during the triumph tour. He had fallen off stage during a concert and need to have his nose reset. He said he was glad that it happened because he didn't really like his nose anyway. She didn't understand, because she thought he was always gorgeous.  
She leaned in again and placed a chaste kiss on his lips, whispering, “what did I do to deserve you in my life?” Smiling, she blushed, her body warming thinking how lucky she was to have this man.  She closed her eyes and whispered to him in silence. I promise to never protect my heart from you again wonderful man, I swear Michael. I will give you everything my heart has to give you always.

She opened her eyes and moved to get up. But as she went to pull away, Michael reached up and locked his arms around her and pulled her down on her side to the warm rumpled sheets of the bed covering both her legs with his thigh.
“Mhmmm good morning sexy,” Michael lowered his head and softly kissed her neck beneath her ear.
“Oohh good morning to you too, did I wake you?”
Michael slowly made his way down the slender column of her neck, sucking and licking, getting pleasured moans and giggled sighs from her in response. He traced his warm fingers up along her side coming up to lightly stroke the tips of his fingers  back and forth along the side of her breast teasing her and she arched her back in reaction to his seductive touch. Wanting to take her slowly, he ran the pad of his thumb over the hardening peak pushing against the soft cotton of her shirt and then finally curving his hand over to cover it completely.
“Where you going so early?”
“I was, umm, I was about to... oh”

It didn’t matter to Michael where she thought she was going. He really wasn’t interested and he wasn't waiting for her to reply. He already knew exactly where she was going and it didn’t require for her to move at all from where she was right now, he was going to take her there.
He pushed her completely onto her back, putting his left leg between her two. His mouth replaced his hand, she gasped harshly and her body tightened instantly from the scorching wet heat from his mouth as his tongue sought out her taut nipple through her tee gently biting it to make her groan. She melted.
Her throat closed tight, restricting her breathing, as her entire body reacted to his touch becoming hot liquid lava. A deep yearning in the very centre of her core began to churn. She could feel the imprint of his morning erection, hot, hard and burning on her thigh.

He didn't want to talk anymore. They had done enough talking. They had said the things they needed to say. He had told her how much he loved her and showed her how much he wanted them be together. Now he just wanted to move forward and be with her, touch her and make her feel good. If she would let him, he was going make her feel so good.
“Michael.” she sighed
“You’re beautiful,” his was voice a deep sultry whisper. “I want to make love to you.”
It wasn’t a question, it wasn’t a request and he wasn’t waiting for her to answer. She was at his mercy. She could only comply.

Returning his hand to her breast, he lifted his head to kiss her; covering her mouth completely with his own he swallowed the small sounds she made.  She returned his kiss feverishly, pulling his tongue in to dance with her own. His slow and deliberate movements made her feel as if she was going to combust internally. She couldn’t even think her body could only respond to his. He moved his hand down her side, gripping and massaging her firmly as he slowly trailed his hand down her rip cage, down past the edge of her t-shirt to caress her hip bone and lightly finger the thin waistband of her shorts. Shifting up slightly, he brought his hand back on a return path, pushing up under the hem bringing his hand up under her shirt to expose her firm breast. His large hand left a trail of goose bumps in its wake.  He groaned inwardly. Her skin felt like silk, so smooth and delicate. He rubbed the palm of his hand over her nipple and stroked back and forth. Her back arched and she moaned his name again, her breath was hot and harsh. He was moving so aching slow and the way he was touching her was driving her insane.

Michael was enjoying the effect he was having on her.  She was so soft and so responsive to his touch as she moved against him. Her eyes fluttered closed as she pulled her bottom lip between her teeth. This was too good to rush. He was in no hurry. He certainly intended to make love to her but not yet. He had waited this long to be this close to her again, he could wait a few minutes more. He wanted to go slow and take his sweet time with her. He ached to be in her, but he knew if he rushed it would be over too soon. Now he wanted to show her what it was supposed to be like when two people felt the way they did about one another. He was awake long before she was, but she didn’t know that. He had wrapped his arms tightly around her, inhaling the lingering scent of her perfume as he lightly traced random patterns along her warm skin. It felt so good to have her in his arms again, to wake up with her bottom curved firmly into him. When she snuggled back into him, it on only reaffirmed what he already knew. Waking up alone would never compare to waking up with this girl in his arms.
She was such a skittish kitten, still, even with him. When she turned over to face him, he didn’t move at all. He kept still wanting to enjoy her in the silence of the moment. To see how she reacted. She always seemed so less afraid, more open when she thought he wasn’t looking at her or waiting for her to show him what she wanted.  Michael held his breath wanting those few precious hushed moments to last as long as possible before giving way to the fury that was building in him. When she went to move away from the warm cocoon of blanket that tangled them, he had to make his move.  Now he had her, right where he wanted her.

He wanted to taste her skin and brought his mouth from hers down to her stomach. He touched her skin with his tongue leaving a wet trail as it followed the same path his hand had taken, sliding it along the flat of her abdomen up between her breasts kissing the sensitive area before pulling a nipple into his mouth. He moved completely between her thighs and gripped her backside and urged her higher and harder against his throbbing erection, rubbing her slowly and sinuously against him. God he wanted to drown in the hot friction between them, the sensual feel of her warm body giving way to him. He groaned as she parted her legs wide and bent her knees to cradle him.

Except for the few words he had spoken and his low groans of satisfaction, he was so quiet, communicating and conversing with her through his warm body only, as if acting on instinct alone. Silence had never felt so boldly erotic and the way he was touching her was making her breath hitch and giving her butterflies. She felt drunk and dizzy from his caress and he hadn’t even really started touching her yet. Her heart was hammering in her chest and she could feel herself getting wet.  His hand traveled down the inside of her thigh to her knee, slipping the crook of his arm under her leg to push it up to her chest as he moved over her. She shuddered as she felt his fingers trail along her skin and hot breath against her ear, her body filled with yearning as he traced her ear with his tongue “girl, I want you naked.”
"Mhmm, yes," she breathed out harshly. Eager to relieve the surges of heat coursing through here, she wanted to be naked too. "Naked is good.”

Pulling his arm from underneath her leg, Michael swiftly and easily manoeuvred her out of her tee. His mouth finding hers again he pulled her tongue deep into his mouth, his tongue sliding along hers, caressing her tongue with soft strokes, swallowing her sexy sighs. He was devouring her like he was a starving man. Allison could do nothing but kiss him back; threading her fingers through his soft dark curls. Her senses overloaded as she tried to focus on how each part of him felt against her. The heat of his body radiated into her. She could feel his prominent erection against the thin barriers of their clothing and now he was touching her with both hands.

He pulled away to look at her, “it feels so good to touch you Ally,” he whispered, then leaned forward to press his forehead to hers. He slowly touched his lips to hers again, "to kiss you."
She smiled shyly at the hot heat of his gaze. It made her spine tingle and she shivered.
She shook her head back and forth; embarrassed now by what she thought as she looked at him.
Michael licked his lips slowly. "Ally, what?" God he couldn't look away from her, he wanted her now.
She lifted her hand to caress his neck, the warm heady rush of desire filling her, "it's just the way... the way you look at me Michael. I’ve never had anyone look at me the way you do.”
“Girl, you don't have to be in awe of me or who I am when I am so in love with you.” He took her hand from his neck and kissed her palm, “I am the one in awe of you, your beauty, sweetness and kindness. Every day I fall in love with you more.”

She couldn’t speak, so instead she snaked her arms around his neck and pulled him down to her, his mouth covered hers instantly in wet hot kiss. The solid wall of his chest pushed against her hard sensitive nipples making her pant into his mouth. His fingers slid beneath the opening of her shorts, so aching close to the place she wanted to feel his touch. Her breath hitched.... Oh god...  She was going to cum before he even got the rest of her clothes off.

He smiled against her mouth and ran his hands up her sides to just under her breasts, stroking the undersides then pushed out firmly towards and along the upper part of both arms, sliding his hands along to reach her hands to bring them flush above her head. He rose up to look at her; licking his lips, his dark brown eyes met her hooded glazed ones before she squeezed them shut. He purposefully rotated his hips and ground his erection into her aching center.
Her orgasm hit her hard as she pressed her hips up to meet his heat, rushing through her as she gave way to the feeling, her back arching and pushing her up closer to him.
“Ohgod... oh god, you’re killing me.” She gasped trying to regain her breath. Allison literally felt she was going to die from the pleasured sensations he was bringing her.
“Don’t die on me yet baby,” he said with a sexy growl.
“I’ll try,” she replied breathlessly.

He released her left hand and she immediately traced fingers down over his shoulder and down his chest. As her hand slid further down his stomach, she was rewarded by a soft hiss of his breath, and the feel of his stomach muscles tightening beneath her fingertips. As she touched him, he let his right hand trace slowly and lazily down the left side of her body until he reached her mid outer thigh. He watched her face. She closed her eyes and was licking her lips, as if she was deeply concentrating on the feel  and touch of his hand. He ran his hand back up her inner thigh, dragging the tips of his fingers along her skin up higher to press them gently, but firmly, against the thin cotton crotch of her shorts.
Opening her eyes, she responded by sliding her hand over his, “yes.”
“You are so sexy.” Michael groaned.
Her eyes closed slowly again. She moved her hand up sliding up his forearm to caress his upper arm. He let his fingers move lightly over the thin fabric that separated him from her. She moaned pushing up seductively and urgently against his hand.
"Ohhh god..." her sigh caught in her throat as he finally edged the material aside to seek out her wet, willing flesh with his caress.
“Ally look at me.”
She opened eyes, biting her lower lip trying so hard to focus on his liquid brown ones.
“I love touching you,” he whispered. “I love feeling how ready you are for me.”
She arched her back again. He body instantly reacting to his words and touch. She felt like she was floating and she was hot all over as his words vibrated along her skin. God she had missed his touch, missed how he could make her feel.
She arched her neck back, “ohgod Michael I love you touching me.”

He reached for the ties of her shorts and pulled the loose bow open, murmuring for her to lift her hips up. She pushed up on her elbows lifting her hips as he tugged her shorts down over her hips and thighs.
Then he moved over her, pressing her back to trail his tongue down over her throat, kissing the hollow of her neck. His mouth was so warm, making her muscles loosen and the tension coil tight in her stomach. Her heart pounded in anticipation. His caress had her gasping. His hand stroked up her thigh, slid over her hip, circling inward, making her tremble. She had never been so aware of her body in her entire life, as though he were moulding it, forming it with his touch.

The feel of her bare skin really made him want to explode. He wanted to taste her, he wanted to touch her, and he burned for the feel of her beneath him. The need for her pounded through him. Her hands began to fumble with the waistband of his pajama bottoms and he rose up on his arms, helping her to free himself. He was so hard it was painful. Then she touched him and he almost came undone right then. He moved down to press hot wet open mouth kissed against her stomach, leaving a trail of goose bumps. He moved his mouth lower and the ache in her belly twisted tighter. He moved lower and kissed her belly button and she almost forgot how to breathe. He kissed the inner junction of her thigh and moved to kiss her inner thigh making a light suction sound. She could feel his hot breath between the legs and his tongue flicked out, stroking her, rasping over her delicate flesh.

She mumbled his name almost incoherently. His eyes drifted up over her as he blew softly on her heated skin. He lowered his head to kiss her again this time pushing his tongue all the way inside honeyed heat, the enticing scent of her almost making him dizzy with desire.  Slowly, sensually, he thrust as deep as he could with each stroke, twisting his tongue inside her silky, tight channel, making love to her with his mouth. She whimpered as he pressed the flat of his tongue against the tiny bundle of nerves and her hips arched up off the bed seeking his mouth. He reached his hand up to find hers, lacing their fingers together as she came for a second time, her hip rolling to the slow rhythm of his strokes.

He moved up her body to reclaim her mouth. She tasted hot and sweet and when he slipped his tongue between her lips. She moaned into his kiss as he slid his tongue along hers, moving slowly and sensually around her mouth and down along her chin to the delicate skin of her neck. Sitting back, he let his eyes drift over her below him.  She was still breathless and her face was flush. Her eyes met his as she ran the palm of her hand down his chest, down his flat stomach, making the muscles twitch. Then she reached for him, holding him tightly in her hand. He groaned as she rubbed her thumb over the mushroom top then pushed down the length of him.

He swallowed hard, he wasn't going to make it, "Ally..." his hips jerked forward, "you have to stop doing that."
"I want to do the same for you," she whispered biting her lip.
God he wanted her to too, but he wanted to make to love her and he couldn't do both. He closed his eyes with a soft groan. He removed her hand from him and gently guided her back down to the bed, covering her body with his own. He moved over her and brought her right leg up as he moved forward to ease into her, almost overwhelmed by the succulent heat of her slick walls clenching down on him. God she was so tight and hot and so wet. She groaned as her body accommodated his girth and accepted his length taking every inch as her softness gave way to his hardness. Michael ground in against her, his warm gaze holding hers, seeing her eyes go hot and dark and intent. This is where he wanted to be. Immersed and lost deep inside her.
She ran her hand down his torso grasping his side, "I love you Michael."
He whispered her name against her lips and lifted his hips to sink back inside her, every part of him consumed by her to the point he couldn't tell where she began or he ended. He rose up on his forearms and used his tongue to trace her lips, “I love you more.”

He looked down the valley of their joined bodies moving in unison, fascinated by their perfect rhythm. Her hips rising to meet his, and her inner muscles  pressing in on him. It came down to this. The only sounds were her soft sighs of pleasure and his groans of satisfaction. She raked her finger tips down his back, tangling her legs against his calves, grabbing his ass she pushed his thrust deeper in to her aching core. Every touch, ever breath, seemed to heightened his arousal. Every movement of her body as she strained against him drove him another step closer to losing control. He tried to go slow, to prolong the intense pleasure, but his body wouldn't cooperate, and then she was lifting up off the bed to meet him stroke for stroke, tight and tense and trembling all around him until she broke with a soft whimper in his ear, her fingernails sinking sharply into his skin as he buried himself deep inside her again and again to follow her right over the edge. Exactly where he wanted to be.


  1. I swear girl I live for your updates. Such a great update first with Neverland and them just being them learning to love each other more with no outsiders and their talk of the baby and then going to meet her other family and Val and the end making love was completely awesome. Loved Michael portraying the pizza man and Val about to kick his butt but so sweet when he thanked her for taking care of  Allie during the miscarriage. I loved the part about them talking about having another  baby a planned one. Overall it was a totaly great update and I am sitting here dying for more!

  2. Uh, excuse me  minute while I catch my breath ... I barely made it past the second paragraph when Ally stretched and felt Michael behind her.  But, I'm sure glad I kept reading :)
    (Now I know why I don't have a dog -- I would not like that early wake up call, particularly in Ally's position!)

     I love the fact that the whole chapter was spent in bed, as Ally thought back thru the last week.

    I knew the trip to the Dayes to meet the new baby would be an emotion one.  For me, holding a new baby is always emotion, even without Ally's experiences.  She's right, it would be so much better to experience the whole thing with Michael, not accidentally.

    I know how Val feels -- let that guy know that he better take care of your friend, but at least Val knows she can expect an invitation to Neverland.  If I was her, I'd let Michael know I expect to have my own "in-law suite" LOL

    They are prefect together -- where they belong.

  3. Imagine waking up to that hard body pressed up against you every morning  & then making love!  I would be in Seventh Heaven!!

    It seems like the time spent together at her apartment only brought them closer together.  Loved when he woke up every morning to fix her breakfast & made a mess of the kitchen.  Wonder if he made her French Toast?

    But I think my favorite part was when they went to her bosses house for Sunday dinner & Ally held the baby while Michael looked over her shoulder, touched the babies hand & the baby grabbed onto his finger.   Then later on that night when Michael told her  he wanted a baby with her & asked if she wanted that too.   I agree with Trish that part was very emotional. 

    Very funny when Michael fooled Val into thinking he was the pizza delivery man!  That's our prankster!!

    Great chapter Badtourgirl!  Can't wait to read more!

  4. hi schaney... thanks for coming by to comment - could you imagine walking around Neverland with Michael before it was Neverland and getting to know what he wants and how he wants to do it? It would be wonderful.

    I can totally see Michael trying to play himself off as  Pizza guy or some delivery guy to fool someone - I am surprised he never got caught in his little tricks - or maybe he did and we just don't know. I am just glad Ally stopped Val from kicking his cute little behind... he probably would have laughed the whole time.

    I am excited too they are talking about babies and planning one - nothing would be more romantic - other than makign one.

    Thanks for commenting..  see you next time!

  5. Hey Trish... hi. Okay let me sit with you - I need to catch my breath too. Hmm Michael in behind you snuggling... yummy - I would never get up again. Now come to think of it - I didn't even think that this whole chapter was in bed, but now that you mention it - I kinda like that they stayed in bed for it too.

    yes going to the Daye's would be emotional - but she has to go - and I think it was easier with Michael there because now they know how they feel about a baby with each other - so now they can plan to have one together on purpose like :)

    I think every woman is Val at some point... crazy protective wine swilling funny snob... but I have to agree with you... she should have a room at Neverland - I wonder how Michael will like that?

    I think they are perfect too... :)

    Thanks for commenting!

  6. hey marianne... hi!

    Well I can't fault you there... hard body, one that belongs to Michael in bed.... seventh heaven and cloud nice all wrapped together in a nice Micahel package.

    I agree, I think the time alone has brought them closer together, so they can just be themselves without having to deal with everyone else... we shall see how that transfer to the tour - but I think they have grown closer so it should work out.

    I think it was just as hard for Michael as it was for Ally if not more so... because he never really saw her pregnant, but he knows he wants children... and he saw what could have been when she was holding the baby... so he needed to ask her, hoping she wanted the same thing AND she does.

    Michael thinks he is so funny fooling everyone - but Val is a tought one... she is not gonna let it go too easily. He should be careful you never know what she might find in her Chanel purse...

    Thanks for commenting!

  7. Finally got the chance to come back and finish reading...I was rudely interrupted this morning when I was reading....I have to agree with mariaann1961  who wouldn't want to wake up pressed against that body every morning!  

    They are both so in love with each other...I adore how MIchael lets Ally know just how much he loves her with words as well as the way he treats and makes love to her...

    What a wonderful update!

  8. Wow, great way to start my weekend, and a long time coming... but well worth the wait to have Michael and Ally finally where they were meant to be with each other.

    I guess he hasn't gotten really good yet with the French toast thing... hehee.  Good thing Ally will have help cleaning up after him at Neverland!

  9. WOW ...what a great chapter ...
    I also loved the fact that Ally talked about her experiences of the past week while laying in her bed , the brief talk with Bill really impressed me , it is important that Bill approves of her , he is very important to Michael :

    He nodded, "I've worked for the Jacksons' since Michael was a little boy and now for the last few years, exclusively for Michael. I love him like a son, you're good for him."
    She swallowed audibly, "Bill, you're gonna make me cry." She sniffed and dabbed at her eyes, "I think we're good for each other."
    He gave her another genuine smile as Michael walked down the path towards them, "you certainly are Allison, you certainly are."

    " You're good for him " well that is just music to her ears now isn't it ?
    I love the " normalcy" of their life together for that week anyway, the morning walk with Samson and then to come home to Michael " cooking " hehe oh lord please help us , can he make Ally's tea now? , cuz that was priority # 1 as I recall , make your girl a decent cup of tea!
    Then just watching movies and reading , talking , can you imagine ??? 
    The visit with Grace and her family was very nice , the baby .....yes the baby " yes I want that with you" had me all teary eyed .

    Well and then ....then there was.....
    .." He didn't want to talk any more. They had done enough talking. They had said the things they needed to say. He had told her how much he loved her and showed her how much he wanted them be together. Now he just wanted to move forward and be with her, touch her and make her feel good. If she would let him, he was going make her feel so good.
    “Michael.” she sighed
    “You’re beautiful,” his  voice was a deep sultry whisper. “I want to make love to you.”
    It wasn’t a question, it wasn’t a request and he wasn’t waiting for her to answer. She was at his mercy. She could only comply."

    That is tough now isn't it " she was at his mercy , she could only comply " yeah that ...that is tough :)

    Oh and then this part :
    “girl, I want you naked.”
    "Mhmm, yes," she breathed out harshly. Eager to relieve the surges of heat coursing through here, she wanted to be naked too. "Naked is good.”Hell yeah , naked is very good , naked with that yummy man . oh damn .....So YES , I loved this chapter , a lot , I loved being part of their life in Huntington beach , just being a " normal couple  so to speak , I love reading about mundane things , like cooking and dishes and walking the dog , I was even sitting here thinking , I bet you Michael would have given anything if he could just accompany Ally on the dog walks , hand in hand and a Labrador and the beach * sigh * Yes my girl C , this was a lovely instalment and now , in a few days they are back in the craziness of the Tour , off to Europe and new adventures , I for one cannot wait.....

  10. *dances onto the blog with her hands in the air and swaying hips*
    Babies, babies, babies, yeah! Babies, babies, babies, yeah!
    I love it! Let them do it the right way this time - no more accidents - but careful planning and LOTS of great practice! Whoop!
    I was just wondering, will he make a decent woman out of her too?

    *Dances out, smiling mischievously*

  11. Hi Nancy!

    Glad you finally got a chance to come back and read. I hate that when that happens... especially when I am Michaeling!

    I think we can all agree with mariaann1961! It would be heaven on earth... just to lie next to him.

    YUP they are totally head over heels for one another, hopefully it will be strong enougth toget them thru the next 8 months!

    Thanks for commenting!

  12. Hi Nancy!

    Glad you finally got a chance to come back and read. I hate that when that happens... especially when I am Michaeling!

    I think we can all agree with mariaann1961! It would be heaven on earth... just to lie next to him.

    YUP they are totally head over heels for one another, hopefully it will be strong enougth toget them thru the next 8 months!

    Thanks for commenting!

  13. Hello H!

    They were apart for a long time weren't they? Over two months - but I think they are getting it right now. And hopefully there will be no running away and no family emergencies to attend to... I think we are ready to tour!

    No Michael had not gotten to good at cooking thing yet, but I have a funny feeling that he is gonna get better and French Toast just may be something he is interested in learning to cook real well! Although I hope he learns to make less mess!

    Thanks so much for commenting!

  14. Hello my lovely E....
    babies, babies, babies... you sound a little like someone else who was waiting on the babies. Yes no more accidents... no more finding her pills elsewhere and lots of planning... which means lots of practice... but right now it will be all practice - coz there is not time for babies on tour... or is there? :)
    He might make a honest woman outta Ally at some point, but being Michael he has his order or operations is just a little backwards....
    Thanks for commenting and dancing lovely one...

  15. well I had to leave you till last YG... first thank you for such a lovely long comment... I love how you summarize everything into neat little packages... I wish I could be that concise when I write - but I talk A LOT

    I definitively agree, getting Bill's approval is important - he is important to Michael and vise versa Bill cared very much for Michael... as we all know at times, Bill was his only travelling buddy on quick trips and I am sure that Bill only wanted to see him happy with someone he could fall in love with.

    Yes life with Ally (sounds like an 80s show) is pretty bland and downright normal - but I think Michael needed that in his life and probably really wanted it at times - although he really was born for the stage - that downtime that he doesn't have to be 100% would be welcoming - but YES Ally must suffer with bad tea - I really hope he gets that down soon - but luckily they will be travelling so she will get her tea from room service or maybe someone will give him some tips on how to get it just right!

    Ugh... comply and then some... could you even imagine him saying those things... I want to make love to you.. or I want you naked... HELL YEAH I want that too... where, when, how.. NOW?? Okay!

    I was thinking almost the same thing as you... about walking the dog and just getting out and doing normal things with Ally... like how he said he had never been to a grocery store - the little things we take for granted as everyday boring chores and tasks that he never got to experience - not that they are all fun and games - but I could not imagine not being able to go out and do something as simple as shopping or taking a walk without being mobbed... after a while you would just want to get away from it all - but you are right our week is up and we are not back on "Michael Jackson" schedule... which as we all know is not normal

    Thanks so much for commenting K...  :)

  16. Ok that was rather steamey.. Love it.. I did happen to notice one thing though.. They just had some unprotected love making and if I'm not mistaken he just released in her.. So my question is.... What is Ally doing for birth control?????????? If this keeps happening there will be babies in the future.... As always C I love your updates and can never wait for more.....

  17. good morning Forever... I was just haning out hear waiting to read your next update..
    Well don't you have a good eye... yes it was unprotected - but there is no need to worry (at least I don't think) - the force does have  a lot of power, but  Ally went back on the pill a week before Michael showed up and she knows exactly where they are too... she won't lose track of them this time around - we can't have babies popping up on tour!
    Thanks for commenting!

  18. I have already commented once but just had to read it again and still loving it and hoping more is coming soon. I thought of the same thing as FM unprotected sex I wondered about that myself maybe another baby in the near future.

  19. hehe... it is okay to comment twice since I haven't given you anything else to comment on - but I am working on it! Nope don't worry... we are gonna be nice and safe now - we have a very hectic tour schedule coming up. Not the place for a pregnant Ally... but lots of love coming your way!

  20. I know you haven't posted a date for an upcoming chapter but just wanted to let you know I am patiently awaiting a new chapter. Love it so much!

  21. Girl I had to let you know I am so excited you gave an date for Aug to update. I have missed this so much! I know you can't update as much as Enola but just had to let you know how much I am looking forward to it!

  22. yes i must apologize it has taken me longer to get back on track than I thought it would... I am glad you are excited, I was afraid my absence make me outta sight! :) See you in a coupla weeks...



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